"Write down all your inner struggles, your setbacks and successes, and grant them eternal life. This way your very essence, the personality of your soul, your spiritual attainments, your life's inner treasures, will live on forever in the lives of your spiritual heirs as generations come and go." - Rav Kalonoymus Kalman Sharpira zt"l, the Piaseczno Rebbe from Tzav V'Ziruz (The Rebbe's personal diary)

Sunday, April 29, 2012

The cold mikvah moshul

Once, when the Chofetz Chaim immersed in the mikvah, he found the water to be very cold. He questioned the caretaker, who insisted that he had heated up the water before adding it to the mikvah and even showed him the kettle he had used. The Chofetz Chaim first felt the kettle, then he put his finger into the water of the kettle, and found the water to be lukewarm. He explained to the mikvah attendant, if boiling hot water is added to the mikvah then the water will become warm. However, he noted, if the water is only lukewarm when it is poured into the mikvah, the water will remain quite cold indeed.

Similarly, if we are trying to ignite within our children an excitement and fervor for Yiddishkeit, we ourselves must be piping hot with enthusiasm. If our ardor for Torah and mitzvos is tepid and unenthusiastic, how will our children be energized and invigorated?

-From Rav Dovid Goldwasser, in the Spring 2012 issue of The Klal Perspectives Journal

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Manifesto for a culture of growth


We have problems and finally the editorial board at The Klal Perspectives is letting us see the insights of many well know leaders and trailblazers within the frum community. The problem is that many (myself included) are not always inspired to grow in our Avodah.  I offered a solution a few years ago that worked for me here, but there's not just a "one size fits all" cure (well, there might be, but you'll have to read all of this post).

I've been privileged to communicate with both the editor of Klal Perspectives and two of those that answered the questions posed for this issue.  A commonly recommended suggestion in four of the articles is the establishment of learning groups (some call them vaadim or chaburos) geared towards growth-oriented learning.  This is, in fact, something that the AishDas Society has been doing successful for a number of years.  For me, the vaad/chabura model works, in edition to the Bilvavi seforim. I know of classes based on this model in several shuls and it seems to work for some.  It's not a THE solution, but it's a viable option and an established one.  Giving people an option to grow can open up multiple doors in a shul.

Getting people to learn seforim that are growth-oriented is a major challenge.  It's sort of like exercise. People wo do it regularly love it (so I've heard).  I know that I don't exercise enough, but when I do I feel better.  The "Zumba" craze has become very popular with women who want to exercise because it's fun (this is based on speaking with people who do Zumba and also based on a very improptu Facebook survey I took).  Zumba's motto is, "Ditch the workout; Join the party!"


They know that exercise is hard work and often difficult. By putting music and dance moves together they have made it fun. I think growth oriented Judaism needs a similar motto. Maybe it should be, "From pause to Go with the turn of a page" or "If you're not growing, your not living".

There are mornings when it's a struggle for me to get out of bed and daven with a minyan. There are plenty of times I say Shema and don't feel that I'm fully accepting Hashem as King. There are times that I will choose not to go learn in the evenings so that I can go to sleep or just veg out. I admit it only because I know that I'm not alone. This is just something that people don't talk about with their friends.  Those that do know me, know that being inspired is something I attempt to work on.  There are days when I successed and days when I can't wait to try again.


I did write that there might a "one size fits all" cure and I think it's finding a community (ie- shul, beis medrash, kollel, Rav) that is focused on Torah, Avodah, and Gemilus Chassadim, which are the foundations of our world. These three items are also the driving force behind Cong. Ahavas Yisrael and often mentioned in the writings and comments of Mark Frankel from BeyondBT.  Each of us can connect and grow by our invovlment in one of these three. We can learn, commit to meaningful davening, or involve ourselves and families in chessed. The main point, as Micha Berger mentioned to me in an email, is that our Torah life has to be a growth process.


I think back to the lyrics of the old TV show "Diff'rent Strokes" as proof for this:
Now the world don't move to the beat of just one drum,
what might be right for may not be right for some.
There's also a great discussion going on at BeyondBT regarding the current issue of Klal Perspectives, here.

Friday, April 20, 2012

New issue of Klal Perspectives (with an article by Rav Weinberger)

BLACK HAT TIP to Micha Berger for emailing me the is link.

The new issue of Klal Perspectives just came out.  Included is an article by Rav Moshe Weinberger, titled "Just one “Just One Thing is Missing: The Soul”, available here on page five.  Every article seems awesome!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

A lesson from Eeyore (rebooted)



This week, finally, I had my initial "session" with my Partner in Torah.  The person I'm learning with is semi-local, so I decided that our first learning experience should be in person.  It was great.  He's a really friendly guy.  Partner's in Torah even supplied us with a curriculum, which made things much easier than the pressure of trying to figure out what to learn.

As we were learning, I admit, I felt rather grateful for my own Jewish education that I was able to receive after finishing public high school.  It's funny how there are so many things I think of as givens within Jewish thought and law that, in fact, were so foreign to me years ago.  On the drive back I thought about an idea I learned from Eeyore many year ago.


"I'm telling you. People come and go in this Forest, and they say, 'It's only Eeyore, so it doesn't count.' They walk to and fro saying, 'Ha ha!' But do they know anything about A? They don't. It's just three sticks to them. But to the Educated - mark this, little Piglet- to the Educated, not meaning Poohs and Piglets, it's a great and glorious A." -Eeyore, summarized from The House at Pooh Corner (chapter 5)

How each of us sees things is based on our own background and knowledge.  It's very easy to live a traditional Jewish life and forget that to those not blessed with the same opportunites you've had, 'A' is just three sticks.

If you can give 30 minutes a week on the phone to learn with someone who wants to grow in their Jewish knowledge, give a call to 800-STUDY-4-2.


Note: This idea about Eeyore and kiruv is something I posted in 2007. After learning with my partner it popped back into my mind.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Rabbi Yisrael Salanter on friendship

"Friendship (hishabb'rus) is better than solitude (hisbod'dus)." -from Even Yisrael p.35. Sited by Geoffrey Claussen in the essay "The Practice of Musar"
Sorry for the brevity
Sent from my phone

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Two realities


In an emailed newsletter from Beis Hamussar that I received today was the following:

If we were asked to encapsulate all of Rav Wolbe's teachings in one sentence, the task would seem impossible. He wrote numerous seforim and gave thousands of discourses over the course of his life. How could one possibly summarize so much in one single sentence? However, Rav Wolbe himself did just that when he sat with a group of former talmidim.He asked them to relay what they understood to be the focal point of all the discourses that they had heard during the years they had studied in his Yeshiva. Each student offered an opinion, but Rav Wolbe was not satisfied. "The message I was trying to convey in all my discourses" he said, "is that we should realize that ruchnius (spirituality) is no less a reality than gashmius (physicality)."
For example, we must believe that just as eating something dangerous is detrimental to one's body, transgressing a commandment is at least as detrimental to one's soul. Conversely, performing a mitzvah does more for us (and the world around us) than the food we eat.

This yesod of acknowledging the reality of ruchnius might have been the basis for this idea found in the introduction to Da Es Atzmecha by Rav Itamar Shwartz (the mechaber of the Bilvavi seforim):
I have come to write this sefer  because of an inner mission – an awareness of a particular world that exists, which in reality, is more real than the world we sense, but is very hidden from people. The inner world is enchanting, it is a world of pleasure and connection, but it is not a world of delusions.  It is a world more real than the table.  It is clearer than the familiar world of the table, the chair, and the  lamp.  Sometimes, when we try to enter the inner world, there is a feeling that since it is unfamiliar, maybe it is just our imagination, maybe it is just delusions of people who want to experience all kinds of things, and so they create a whole structure out of all their fantasies.  But you must know that the inner world is more realistic than the world we live in.  However, just as a blind person doesn't see what's in front of him, and he might ask, "Are you certain this exists?" 
Both Rav Wolbe zt'l and R Shwartz are teaching us that there are two realities. Most of us want to see the results, peiros (fruits), or the carrot at the end of the stick (even if the carrot is imaginary) in our spiritual efforts. It doesn't work like that. This idea, the reality that is referenced above, is something that isn't on my mind enough. Try as I might to be passionate about living a life of Simchas HaChaim, I find it easy to be focused on the reality that is only preceived by my five senses.

I have no idea if the spiritual reality is something that my kids have been taught about.  I know that they understand that each mitzvah we perform perfectly creates a malach that is our advocate in Shamayim.   It seems to me that our acknowledgment of the reality of ruchnius has to be as strong as our acknowledgement of the neshama.  We have a body and a soul, both are real.  This sort of gives a new spin to the phrase, "Keeping it real".

Monday, April 09, 2012

The one time of the year it's ok to be "the Jews with the crumbs"


From here

This phrase, "the Jews with the crumbs" is one that I use in a semi-joking way with my family and close friends. It's sort of my version of the speech that kids get when they go on a school field trip or their camp goes off-site for an activity.  You know the speech, it always starts off, "Now kids, we're going to a place where they don't usually see a group of Jews like you. Jews who love Hashem and follow his Torah."

As a general rule, I dislike going to recreational places on a Sunday (or during Chol HaMoed) where there are tons of other observant Jews, because, more often than not, we all bring our own snacks with us.  That's all find and dandy, but often I, sadly, find that many of my brothers and sisters will not pick up their trash and leave a huge mess of litter, heimishe food wrappers and juice boxes...thus giving those of us who accept Torah mi'Sinai a bad name.  So, I tell my family that I don't want us to be known as, "the Jews with the crumbs."

Call me extreme, fanatical, and over-sensitive. I don't mind. I think that every time we are at home or in public we have an opportunity m'kadesh Hashem.

That being written, I sat at my desk today during work and ate my shmura matza with jelly, carefull not to let too many crumbs escape the plate.  I had flashbacks to my favorite lunches when I was in public school from K-12.  Hands down, the best lunches of the year were my kosher for Passover lunches.  Corned beef on matza, lox on matza, brisket on matza, margarine and jelly on matza, a hard boiled egg, a fruit, and usually some type of small chocolate or the every popular jelly fruit slices.  Not only were those lunches yummy, but they also were a very visable way to seperate myself from everyone else eating lunch.  There was no way to hid the fact that I was Jewish.

I am not a fan of leaving messes around.  However, for all of the children and famlies that have always gone to school within the day school and yeshiva system, I think Pesach outings allow us to really remember that we are different than everyone else.  Eating your matza sandwich in a park, designated eating area at a museum, or a zoo means that you're out in public and other see that we are different.  As the tile of this post indicates, this might be only time in the year when it's ok to be "the Jews with the crumbs."

There's nothing wrong with being different, looking different, or eating different, just try not to make a mess.

Wednesday, April 04, 2012

"How long did your Seder last?"

From my earliest youth, I remember that the children would ask each other on the first morning of Pesach, "How long did your Seder last?"
This was true in my youth, and it is still the case today. If the children were to ask me this now, I would answer them, "I made sure to eat the afikoman before chatzos (midnight)."


-Rav Shimon Schwab zt'l from Rav Schwab on Prayer (pg 541)

May you have a liberating and freilichen Pesach!

Link to a write-up of Rav Moshe Weinberger's Shabbos HaGadol drasha


Dixie Yid has done the almost impossible (again).  He posted the official write-up of Rav Weinberger's Shabbos HaGadol drasha, here.  Seems the drasha was on Shabbos this year.  In the past it has been Motzei Shabbos and the mp3 has been available the next day.

While I have yet to read it (it's printed and sitting in my car), I know that Dixie Yid takes great care in writing up the Torah of his Rebbe.  I know that this must have taken a huge chunk of time and you have to go to Dixie Yid's blog and check it out.

Tuesday, April 03, 2012

A Pesach lesson from my son

Photo from here.  Personally this reminds me of
the Scooby Doo Mystery Machine.

Last week during carpool my 12 yr old son shared the following revelation with me:

Abba, did you know that a Mitzvah Tank is just an RV that they Na Nach up Lubavitch style?

I smiled at his his observation, but it also initially bothered me. I have always found it somewhat troublesome when someone copies something from someone else and then they (those who copy) get credit for being creative and original.  I cringed when people would tell me how Blue Fringe had this "awesome new song" called "Hafachta" (originally written and performed by Diaspora Yeshiva Band).  I smirked when teens would tell me that "they came out with another Willy Wonka movie, but that guy just isn't as weird as Johnny Depp".  Some remakes of movies and cover songs are not all bad.  I just don't like it when the originals get overlooked for, simply, being original.

Now, I don't blame my son.  He's seen Mitzvah Tanks in Chicago.  He has also seen videos of Na Nachs dancing in Tel Aviv, photos of their Na Nach'ed up vehicles, and even seen some guys selling their swag Motzei Shabbos on Central Ave (in Cedarhurst, NY).  In his mind, the Chabad that copied the Na Nachs, not the other way around.  It's his frame of reference only because he saw the Na Nachs do it first.

I have been thinking about this for over a week. At first, as I described above, I was bothered. Then, after some hisbonenus  I gained a better perspective on things.  A number of years ago I heard an amazing vort on the chatzatzros, trumpets, used in the Mishkan.  R David Orlofsky quotes Rav Moshe Shapiro, who brings up the point that after Moshe was niftar, the trumpets he used were put away and hidden. Yehoshua had to fashion his own. Rav Shapiro says the reason is that each generation doesn't aways respond to the clarion call of the previous generation. While the message is the same, the mode for communiting it has to be different.

R Micha Berger puts it like this on his blog:
The call of the shofar is eternal, and thus a shofar is not invalidated by age. However, in contrast to the raw, natural, shofar, the silver chatzotzros are man-made. Their message changes as people do. The call of the chatzotzros is distinct for the generation.

If each generation has to be approached differently then, kal v'chomer (even more so) for each person.
We know that, " A person is obligated to see himself as if he were leaving Egypt." (Pesachim 116b)
The way that I might perceive my own freedom from Mitzrayim is, in fact, totally different than how anyone else sees it.  This obligation totally makes sense based on my son's observation about the Mitzvah Tank.  My son has no choice but to see things from his perspective.  Hopefully he will experience Pesach in a very personal and meaningful way.  Hopefully I will, too.

"The Pesach Plan"- by R Avi Shafran





The story below is being posted with direct permission for Rabbi Shafran. His father's memoir, Fire Ice Air: A Polish Jew's Memoir of Yeshiva, Siberia, America is available for purchase here and was also just released for purchase as an e-book (only $3.99) at Jewish e-Books, here.

I bought this book last year before Pesach and found it to be a fascinating story of survival, determination, and family.  There are amazing first-hand accounts of yeshiva life prior to the Shoah and how much impact one person can have on family, friends, and a community.

THE PESACH PLAN

Rabbi Avi Shafran

The group of Novardhoker yeshiva bochurim and their rebbe (and his rebbetzin)—along with a number of families—were packed into the train’s stock cars in the summer of 1941. Since Rav Yehudah Leib Nekritz, zt”l, and his talmidim, then in Soviet-conquered Lithuania, had declined the offer of Russian citizenship, the Soviets were providing them an all-expense-paid trip to Siberia. Occasional pieces of bread and cups of water were also offered at no charge during the weeks of travel. Not to mention the cruise across a lake on a barge to the work camp where my father, may he be well, the youngest of the yeshiva group, and his rebbe and friends, would spend the years of the Second World War.

The Siberian summer is oppressive; insects left the exiles at times unrecognizable for their swollen faces. Winter in the taiga, of course, brought challenges of its own, including 40 degree below zero temperatures.
In his short memoir, “Fire Ice Air,” my father recalls that even as the yeshiva exiles arrived in the East, Pesach was already on their minds.

And so, as they worked in the fields, some of the boys squirreled away a few kernels of wheat here and there, carefully placing them in their pockets—something that was “entirely against the rules, and very dangerous.”

“The Communist credo, though,” he writes, “was ‘from each according to his ability, to each according to his needs’ and so we were really only being good Marxists. Our spiritual needs, after all, included kosher for Pesach matzo.”

They put the kernels in a special bag, which they carefully hid where no one could find it.

The winter was brutal but the Novardhokers all survived it, as did the bag of grain. When the end of the cold season was rumored to be near, they ground the kernels into flour with a small hand grinder intended for coffee beans. My father remembers that the flour was coarse and dark, but resplendent all the same.
The next part of the Pesach plan was to arrange for the actual matzo-baking. Although the yeshiva boys were barracked with non-Jewish locals, there was one hut in the area that was occupied solely by a Jewish family, the Beckers, who had come from Kovno. Arrangements were made for some of the boys to come to their house in the middle of the night, when all the town’s residents were asleep, and fire up their oven on full blast for two hours to make it kosher. Then they would bake matzos for the family and themselves.

Since matzo dough is traditionally perforated in rows to ensure that it is “baked through,” the young men improvised a special tool for the purpose by whittling a piece of wood so that it could be fitted with gear-wheels borrowed from a clock. The apparatus was rolled over each matzo-dough quickly before the baking. 
“When Pesach came,” he recalls, “we all gathered at the hut and all of us—the Nekritzes, we yeshiva boys, and the Beckers—were able to fulfill the mitzvah of eating matzo on the first night of Pesach, in remembrance of our ancestors’ release from the outsized prison that was ancient Egypt. Understandably, it was a mitzvah that resonated strongly for us.”  The four kosos could not so easily be addressed; there was no wine and there were no grapes to be found in Siberia. But, to at least undertake some semblance of that mitzvah, the exiles managed to obtain milk—an expensive delicacy in its own right—and used it instead. To them, my father writes, “it tasted of the finest wine.”

The group even bartered some of their possessions for a few eggs, traditionally eaten at the Pesach Seder. Some of the eggs were frozen, he recalls, “but that was nothing that a bit of roasting couldn’t cure.”
As we all prepare for Pesach this year, cleaning our homes and polishing our silver and shopping for our personal plethoras of pesachdikeh products, accounts like my father’s—whether from Siberian exiles, concentration camp inmates, or Jews in hiding—should be required reading, and required pondering, for our children and for ourselves.

They provide something priceless: perspective.

© 2012 AMI MAGAZINE
The above essay may be reproduced or republished, with the above copyright appended.


Sunday, April 01, 2012

"Building a Sanctuary in the Heart" vols 1 & 2

Photo from here

The English adaptation of Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh volumes 1 and 2 was recently republished in English as parts 1 and 2 now in one complete volume.  It's available here for online purchase and is currently available in Chicago at Kesher Stam.

From the Nehora.com website:


"Building A Sanctuary In The Heart" is the first in a series detailing practical steps on how to attain deveikus to Hashem at all times. The Hebrew title – Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh sums up the three elements of the method. The goal is to create in oneself a sanctuary within which the Divine Presence will rest. The method is “building” step by step in a concrete way that is both simple and profound. The tool is “my heart”. The author presents an outline of the way to achieve this deveikus, one step at a time in short paragraphs, so that each point can be absorbed independently, at a comfortable pace.


The author has associated himself with the tzadikim in our generation, from who he has received haskamos to his Hebrew sefarim. Using an eclectic approach, he has developed a method that speaks to the hearts of Jews from all walks of life. As a bookstore owner in Yerushalayim put it: “His sefarim are lapped up by the entire spectrum, from Modern Orthodox youths to Meah She’arim Chassidim!” His audiences on a lecture tour in the States last summer included Y.U. graduates, secular Israeli college students, yeshivaleit, Sephardim, seminary students and Chassidim.



The translation is presented in readable English, while being faithful to the style of the source text. It also includes additional paragraphs not included in either the original Hebrew or the Yiddish, Spanish or Russian editions. These were taken (with the author’s permission) from cassette recordings of the shiurim on which this sefer is based.


Nesivos Shalom on middos

Rav  Shalom Noach Berezovsky zt'l, the Slonimer Rebbe 
In is series of seforim, Nesivos Shalom, the Slonimer Rebbe zt'l writes (in one of the many sections on Tikun HaMiddos):
One needs to feel the joy of acquiring positive traits and realize how miserable he is as long as he is mired in negativity. A person of positive traits is happy—at peace with others, at peace with God, at peace with himself. The opposite is true of one whose traits are negative—he is irritable, not at peace with others, God, or himself. It is contention within your gates—within your own personal gates there is contention: He fumes with anger at himself; he is depressed and lethargic; he is full of jealousy and animosity toward others; he doesn’t like to be around people and they don’t like to be around him; he is full of bitterness at the Almighty concerning his lot. Once a person comes to the clear realization that his happiness actually depends on the rectification of his character, he will spare no effort in pursuit of his own happiness. The whole of a person’s life and times hinges on his character. (Translation by R Jonathan Glass)